Kiss Your Frogs

The Surprising Twist To Turn ANY Warty Business Problem into a Royal Advantage!

kissthefrogIt was Saturday morning. I was clutching the steering wheel of my Buick, headed north for a romantic getaway up the west coast of California.

The directions were loaded into the GPS. But at the last minute, a close friend whispered a “better way” to avoid the LA traffic (saving our sanity in the process).

So when the GPS said to sail straight on the 5, I veered right onto the 57 instead. (I was livin’ on the edge . . . ‘cause that’s how Unstoppables roll.)

The scribbled note on the worn piece of ripped paper had clear directions for me to follow. And with my very left-brain, detail-oriented, uber-observant boyfriend in the car with me, we were GOLDEN.

There was NO possible way 2 smart kidos like us could flub things up.

Yet there we were, an hour later, watching signs looming before us, reading: “Vegas Ahead!”

Our hearts sunk.

My boyfriend and I were LOST.

(Hang tight – this has EVERYTHING to do with your business… I promise!)

With bugged-out eyes, I swerved off the freeway and onto the very next exit ramp. Looking frantically around for some semblance of direction, street signage, or placement of the sun to determine just where the heck we were (and what went oh-so-wrong?), I found myself pulling up to a Starbucks.

And that’s when it all became clear.

I had SOMEHOW, SOME way, been transported an hour off course — only to find myself pulling into the parking lot of the VERY SAME Starbucks that I had “accidentally” stumbled upon just 2 short weeks before on another long road trip (yes, I was lost then, too).

Note: This is the perfect time to insert the super-spooky, Twilight Zone theme song…

Yup. Somehow. Some way. I was RIGHT smack-dab at the very same weirdo spot. HOURS away from home. In the midst of the vast, insanely –sprawling LA landscape.

There was just NO f-ing way.

My boyfriend and I are sharp people… and we were paying attention! It’s just NOT possible…

(Oh, but apparently it was.)

My boyfriend uttered something about being late, a few muffled grumbles, and sported a stern, furrowed brow. (He was not the happiest of campers. And for a moment, neither was I. )

But sitting in that Starbucks parking lot, it became clear once again: for the millionth time in my life, there was a bigger, weirder, wackier choreography going on. Beyond my control. EVERYWHERE.

Scratching my red head, I thought: “Perhaps I’m a red-headed puppet in Source’s silly play?”

So I smiled, and kept driving.

“Wouldn’t it be nice to watch the sun set over the ocean tonight?” I cooed to my boyfriend along the drive. (But there was little chance of that now, considering our previous “creative” detour).

I drove for hours. Endless hours. Winding, trickling, blurring hours.

And finally – as I saw our hotel right before us – I looked to my left to see  the giant yellow orb of the setting sun just beginning to kiss the horizon line of the ocean.

We pulled the car over at the overlook-turnoff right before us. And as Ian and I stepped out of the car and walked to the railing, within the very next 15 seconds we watched the sun rapidly melt, then disappear, into the most breathtaking purple-orange haze from the warm glowing waters.



The sunset I’d dreamed about all day long was delivered. In total perfection. Not ONE second wasted.

And without our (temporarily-frustrating) Vegas-Starbucks adventure, I’m pretty sure I’d have missed it entirely (instead snoozin’ away in my crisp white hotel sheets).

But you may be grumbling to yourself: “Gag-me-with-a-Spoon, McWilliams! That’s such a measly, mousy example — my business bummers are WAY BIGGER than your woe-is-me Starbucks-sunset detour!

Sure. I get it. It’s teensy compared to life’s bigger pains-in-the-arse.

But think about it:

What other life (or business) “detours” are you labeling as: Bad? Failures? Terrible? Hopeless? Awful? …Or just downright shitty? — When perhaps they are actually trying to detour you toward a fairytale sunset of your own?)

If you ask me – it’s ALL of them. Every last freakin’ one.

Oh sure, the entire globe will cry ya a river when your business shit hits the fan.

But what if they’re all WRONG? …About EVERYTHING?

What if life has always been handing us DIAMONDS, but we’ve innocently been mislabeling them… well….as TURDS?

What if ALL business-bummers are actually massive blessings in disguise? (Ones that sometimes take awhile to see clearly – for what they TRULY are?)

When I take a look at some big ol’ giant turds in my own past, I realize that (except for the stories inside my head) everything has been downright dreamy:

  1. My Bankruptcy CREATED my current career.

I wouldn’t be transforming women’s businesses if I hadn’t gone through that tough stuff first… It showed me what DIDN’T work — so I get to teach you what DOES.

  1. My past struggles, heartaches and depressions were PERFECTION.

If I hadn’t gone through hell and back, my clients couldn’t relate to me. And I couldn’t help them either unless I’d helped myself FIRST…

  1. Every person who says “YES!” (or “No!) to my work is DIVINE.

When a client leaves, it creates space for something new. When someone says “No!” I’m being spared from a non-ideal situation. And when work slows down, I get R+R before the next big wave…

  1. Last year’s “slump” and my Father’s death were HEAVEN-SENT.

You heard me. Not only do I have my most-amazing father as my 24-7 spiritual cheerleader – inspiring me endlessly from the other side! — but I also got time for loads of soulful-introspection that’s cracked open a whole new layer of my mission. Myself. Be still my heart…

There’s no exception to this rule. Thing is, are you brave enough to tell a story that delights you, instead of bummin’ you out?

Because life is NEVER as cruel to us as we are to ourselves — by the scary stories we tell.

That’s’ all life is anyway: the story you choose to tell.

YOU get to choose how you perceive what happens. YOU get to decide if you’re tell a lousy tale, or a peppy one. Nothing’s set in stone. It’s ALWAYS your choice.

Sure, some may call that wishful thinking. So be it. Wishful thinking it is…

But at the end of the day, it all comes down to this: Do you want to be HAPPY? Or blue?…

And boy, if you haven’t noticed already: Life goes GREAT when you’re focused sunny-side up. (But things get pretty darn lousy when you’ve got your gaze in life’s gutter.)

Sure, when you’re in the muck of your mess, it’s easy to feel lost, lonely and lousy. But in life’s big-picture show, those short term downers always look like long-term GEMS!

So if you’re committed to living an UNSTOPPABLE life, and building an UNSTOPPABLE business, this is one of the first rules you must embrace.

Now let’s put things into practice…


As this week’s fun game, take just 1 of life’s (seeming) bummers, and craft a new story – one that has a super-duper happy ending!

Pretend you’re writing a fairytale about your very own life — cast your characters, set the stage, create your plot, and delight in your creation.

You may feel goofy at first. You may think you’re blowing smoke up your own bum. But try it on anyway, and see how it feels…

Look at this bummer from a God’s-eye perspective. Your Soul’s perspectve… The TRUE perspective.

(Cause Source sees ONLY good  — “bad” and “wrong” are just lousy human constructs.)

In the big-picture purpose of your life, everything is working out. Every moment is a gift. The big ones, and the small ones.

Life is FOR you — never against you.

We humans have been wrong this whole darn time…

Learning to kiss life’s green, slimy, stinky, warty frogs — and turn them into Princes — is a magical skill that will serve you till the end of time. Every day. All day long. Forever and ever. Amen.

Every sorrow, tragedy, loss, death or destruction has a silvery-white lining. I’ve already lived through a TON of ‘em to know it’s true, first hand.

It’s just a matter of being wild and crazy and daring enough to go against the depressing human grain, and pave a new positive pathway.

So join me and all the other “crazies” out there — and start making up a Fairytale-esque spin to all of your business (and life) woes…

Then… enjoy the JOY!

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  1. Lorraine
    Posted May 9, 2014 at 9:03 pm | Permalink

    Priceless: It’s just a matter of being wild and crazy and daring enough to go against the depressing human grain, and pave a new positive pathway.

  2. Ntathu Allen
    Posted May 9, 2014 at 9:08 pm | Permalink

    Gosh, Stephanie, I got goosebumps when I read the sentence “…And when work slows down, I get R+R before the next big wave…” the words struck deep and had such an impact on me and helped me shift my mindset (in that very moment) from one of dread and fear (where is the next client coming from/how am I going to pay my bills, help, panic panic panic) to one of total acceptance and joy. Gosh. I soooo need to rest and not stress. Its incredible how those few words “And when work slows down, I get R+R before the next big wave…” has made such a sense of space and openness in my heart and I’m looking forward to the wave and will be rested and prepared to give my all. Thank you for that. And the sunset is perfect timing as well.

    • Stephanie McWilliams
      Posted May 9, 2014 at 11:15 pm | Permalink

      I’m SO glad to hear that you resonated with the message. Isn’t it amazing how 1 sentence can change us? I totally get it… Thanks for sharing your thoughts – I’m so moved by your message. And I can totally, utterly relate!!! Stay in touch…

  3. Lukcy
    Posted May 10, 2014 at 1:14 am | Permalink

    Hey Stephanie,

    I just wanted to say thank you. Thank you so much. I’ve read quite a lot of emails lately from a lot a wonderful women. Not all of them resonate, yet when I see your emails, it’s on the mark every time. Just letting you know that you’re on the right path and my resonating is the proof. 🙂


    Lukcy Charms

    • Stephanie McWilliams
      Posted May 10, 2014 at 1:19 am | Permalink

      Oh, thank you SO much for your very very sweet comment – it’s so wonderful to know that my message is resonating for you! Please let me know what topics you’re interested in and I’d love to consider them for future articles… It really means the world to get your feedback. Stay in touch! I hope I get to connect with all of you personally one day! TONS of love!!!! OXXO

  4. Sunshine
    Posted May 10, 2014 at 11:58 am | Permalink

    Thank you, Stephanie, for this great life lesson. It certainly inspires me to keep going, even in the face of “setbacks”, until the goal is reached. I love that you experienced that beautiful sunset. God gives us the desires of our hearts. I also wonder if there is something (or someone) calling you to that particular Starbucks?
    Have a wonderful day. Today, I set out with my beloved for a long-awaited trip to Europe! It has been a long, long haul to get to this point. Now comes the “active” R&R. I am looking forward to a grand adventure!
    Thank you for your letters. They are always inspiring and thought-provoking.
    Peace and blessings,

    • Stephanie McWilliams
      Posted May 10, 2014 at 3:30 pm | Permalink

      Thanks for taking the time to write your very sweet letter… I love sharing these stories and ideas with all of you! And just know that I can struggle with all of this, just like the rest of humanity. But I LOVE the freedom of seeing what’s always there: LOVE! And I’m endlessly amused by how we tend to overcomplicate and muddle up all of life’s little adventures… So thanks for being there, so I get the opportunity to mull over these delicious ideas – and have wonderful people like YOU to share them with! XOXOXO

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