How Taking Pride in Your Clients’ Success Will Bite You in the Butt
A client recently shared some exciting news: she just hit her first 5-figure WEEK . . . Hip Hip Hoooorah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She’s gone from stuck, broke and spinning her wheels, to embracing her brilliance (and bringing in the bucks) — all within a few short months.
Obviously I’m giddy. Quantum leaps like this delight me to my core.
But no matter how happy I am with a client’s uber-successes, I make it a goal to never take responsibility for them.
I’ve been down that seductive road before – believing that I caused the awesomeness in another. But I’ve learned my lesson…
Sure, it may LOOK like I had something to do with my cients’ rockin’ results. But to take responsibility for their unstoppability leads to only 1 lousy thing:
Heartache.
. . . Because if I’m responsible for their success, that also means I’m responsible for their failures, too.
The less responsible you feel about the results of others, the better mentor you become. Your job is to show up; tell them the truth; love ‘em up; and be an example for what’s possible. Anything more than that is delusion and ego.
We are each responsible for our own lives, actions and thoughts. While others can most definitely inspire us, no one can make you do anything – good, bad or ugly.
Sure, your brain tells you otherwise . . . but that’s all a big fat hairy lie. That thinking has you believe you’re a puppet to the whims of your ever-changing environment.
And bluntly said: It makes you a VICTIM.
If you believe a coach, mentor, partner or friend is the CAUSE of your happiness, you’re screwed. Royally. Humans are adorable, but they’re just to darn flawed to hang your hopes and dreams upon them. Handing your power over to another just creates blame, resent and bitchiness. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow. But one day this kind of stinkin’ thinking will crumble you like a house of cards.
So the next time a client beams their unstoppable successes . . . celebrate WILDLY! Bask in the sheer delight of seeing someone standing in their divinely-designed POWER! (Just don’t take it personally.)
And if a client appears to “fail?” . . .
Simply stand strong, and be a shining example of what’s possible.
They’ll move toward positivity, or they won’t. They’ll take your advice, or not. They’ll make bold leaps, or they’ll choose to stay stuck.
Either way, it’s never ever ever up to YOU.
Sure, I still get trigged sometimes. But I know how this icky story ends . . . The more you learn to drop this schtick, the brighter you’ll shine for those who ARE ready to move forward. And most importantly, you’ll be the teacher of TRUTH. A woman in her power. In charge of what she believes. In control of how she feels.
That’s the only way the world will change: 1 woman at a time. Being an example. Brave enough to stand in your own unstoppability!
So while I encourage you to be over the moon when someone is enjoying their journey, make sure to check ego at the door. Their joys, successes, pains and trials belong to them, and them alone.
Drop the old mythology that you can make anyone do, feel, or think something different. That way you’ll get the perks of feeling great when they’re happy . . . and you’ll no longer tank when they’re blue.
It’s time to unleash your Unstoppable self upon the world. Are you up for the job? . . . Because oh baby — it’s TIME!
© 2012 Stephanie McWilliams LLC
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