TRYING TO CONTROL LIFE’S DETAILS —
HAS YOU MISS OUT ON THE MIRACLES.
So picture this:
It’s a glorious San Diego day – and I’m out for a hike with one of my dearest gal-pals in the world, M.E. Law (a ridiculously talented singer-songwriter) . . .
And just ask we’re getting into our walkin’ groove — we come across a pile of furniture by the side of the road.
Now, mind you: M.E. and I lived in the same building in Brooklyn way back in the day – and if you’ve ever lived in NYC, you know that finding furniture on the street corner is almost identical to stumbling across bricks of GOLD.
So it’s no surprise that M.E.’s eyes BUG OUT with the beauty of this fabulous find.
I could almost hear her thoughts: “Should I paint it? …Reupholster it in pink velvet? …Turn it into a wall sculpture?”
(We New Yorker women are VERY resourceful.)
Then we look at each other, and both scratch our heads: But how the HECK are we going to get this chair back home?
(Nothing was going to ruin our walk!)
So as any Unstoppable woman would: I picked up the chair, hoisted it over my head . . . and we continued on our way – heading right into a deep local canyon.
(But little did we realize that our newly-adopted chair would NEVER make it home… and tears were about to pour!)
It only made sense that I should carry the abandoned seat, since I’m noticeably taller (and stronger). So we headed right into the belly of the canyon — chair in hand — trekking around large rocks; over dried-up creek beds; up steep, treacherous slopes; and through narrow passageways.
And when we popped out the other side, we decided to treat ourselves to our favorite lunch at a local outdoor café — I, for one, had most definitely EARNED IT!
I sat the chair right outside the café entrance, as M.E. and I entered to place our order.
Only 10 minutes later, we were sitting outside, basking in the sunshine, eating our delicious, perfectly-toasted veggie sandwiches, and giggling away with the Japanese owner, Romi (an especially-fun treat, since M.E. is fluent in Japanese).
Then, as we started heading home, and we breezed past the café’s entrance, the memory of the chair popped into my head… “Oooopsie!”
[And this is when everything turned into slow-motion…]
I pivoted my body toward the entrance – to the spot where I’d left the lonely chair.
But in the VERY MOMENT that my brain realized that the chair was no longer there…
…I heard the LOUDEST CRACK!!!!!
(A noise that I instantly knew could ONLY be the sound of wood, being broken…Specifically, the leg of a wooden chair.)
Ug.
Still in slow-motion, I shifted my body just a few inches to the left – just enough to lean and peer down the alleyway beside the shop… like I’d entered a seriously-bad Kung-Fu movie…
There, in the alley, my eyes locked onto a small, sweet face of the Japanese owner, Romi…caught in the act: 1 knee lifted high, as she brought a chair leg down onto her thigh… splintering it in two.
And scattered at her feet were various-sized pieces of wood.
The corpse of what was left of M.E.’s chair…
That’s when I bent at the waist… and started to cry.
Not from sadness. …But from LAUGHTER!!!
Sheer delight. Hysterical joy! …Over-the-top EUPHORIA!!!
I had carried that damn chair for an HOUR on my back…
Sweatin’. Hoofin’ it. In a deft, cardio balancing act.
Instantly I felt a warm wave of gratitude flood through my chest… my heart.
I LIVE for moments like these.
Belly laughs and life’s lil’ absurdities are what get me off. Bigtime.
Sure, could I have twisted my panties into a tight knot over the unfortunate demise of our sweet, beloved chair?
Yup-o.
But was it worth carrying that stinkin’ chair for an hour – through streets, valleys, canyons and more — only to find a teensy-tiny woman in a dark alley… smashing it to smithereens!?
…Oh HELLLLLLLLLLLLLL yes!!!!!!!!!!!!
So why in the WORLD am I telling you this odd story today?
Because what followed was utterly fascinating to me – and encapsulated how we often cause ourselves a lot of [unnecessary] heartache…
Romi, upon realizing what she’d done, began to bow profusely. Horrified. Ashamed. Devastated at what she’d innocently done…
I knelt in hysterics…
And M.E. just stared dumbfounded at the pile of wooden remains — repeatedly mumbling consoling words to Romi in Japanese….
So there we were: 3 wonderful women, each having our own unique experience over the same stupid little chair.
Which just proves the point I’ve known for decades:
-
We CHOOSE our happiness.
-
And we CHOOSE our pain.
(No exception.)
Depending on your perception, you will either FIGHT life’s divine choreography – or you roll with God’s perfect punches.
We were like Goldilocks and the Three Bears:
I was having *TOO* much fun (if that’s possible?) from this utterly-absurd scenario.
Romi? Well, she had a smidge too little….
And M.E. had a “just right” middle-ground mix of both laughter… and a slight case o’ bummerdom.
When you go with the flow = you realize that there is an orchestration… a grand plan… a giant tapestry of details and delights… that are ALWAYS lining up wise-n-wonderful people, objects, situations and scenarios — built beautifully for Y-O-U.
But when you FIGHT life’s plan, and try to control-freak your way through your journey = you slow things down, swim upstream, feel more pain, and have a shit-balls time of it, all-around.
So what if you could DROP your need to control every little thing — and actually relaxed into a trust that every single stinkin’ thing was being designed, constructed and crafted FOR you (not AGAINST you)?
What if everything was on it’s way to “WONDERFUL!” (even if you can’t see the big-picture-plan yet)?
How many times have you found yourself in situations like these:
- Freaking out when a person (or pet) dies… before you feel “READY”?
- Trying desperately to make a particular person LOVE you?
- Impatiently waiting for a project or plan to pan out perfectly… YESTERDAY!?
- Frustrated that you lost a job or opportunity… when no REPLACEMENT is in sight?
- Weirding-out when money isn’t rolling in as FAST as you’d like?
… I sure-as-heck have felt all of the above. (More times than I care to admit!)
But every moment you try to force, push, shove and direct life’s details to match your brain’s picky preferences — it’s nothing more than an expression of your incorrect, short-sighted perspective on life’s ever-evolving perfection.
PUT BLUNTLY: It’s you, letting your inner Control-Freak-Flag FLY!!!!!!!
(Which hurts like a biach.)
When we view our lives through dark, narrow blinders: we hurt.
But if we could step back, and take in the big picture — we’d see the awe-inspiring MIRACLES that are taking place, at every moment.
So what if you and I just learned to kick back and relax a bit more — and chose to TRUST that Source has got our back?
What if you:
- Trusted that everything that was ending, leaving or dying… was SUPPOSED to be that way? (So that something —or someone— even BETTER could come in?)
- Enjoyed the natural, divinely-designed ups-n-downs — and turned life into the most exciting roller-coaster ride on the PLANET?
- Stopped wondering, worrying, or fretting about what’s around the corner — knowing that a force far smarter, wiser (and funnier!) than you has got everything planned to PERFECTION?
- Saw all the people and situations in your life as God-in-Disguise — here to give you EXACTLY what you want (even if you can’t see its loving logic yet)?
…What would your life be like then?
But don’t trust what I say. …Go try it on, and TEST it yourself!
Turn this week into a game, and see how many moments you can relax, trust and roll with the punches!
See if you can spot the humor in everything around you…
Try to step back and view life from a God’s Eye perspective.
Imagine each moment being kindly choreographed — on your behalf!
Then repeat to yourself throughout the day:
“This is what my life looks like… on the way to WONDERFUL!!!!”
Then report back below.
The power of positivity lies in your very hands.
Always has.
Always will.
Are you brave enough to wield its magic, Sister?
(Hope so.)
© Copyright 2015 Stephanie McWilliams LLC
